UK Election Special

If you are in America, it may have slipped your attention that there is an election going on in the UK. And an interesting one at that. After almost a century of a two-party system dominated by Labour and the Conservatives, a third party has entered the mix in the Liberal Democrats - and the latest opinion polls suggest it is so tight, they could even wind up winning the damn thing. The combination of recession, war, scandal and a staggeringly unpopular incumbent leader has left the electorate desperate to give the political class a kicking - making this the most unpredictable election in decades. It could be history in the making, and we'll be profiling each of the main parties before the nation heads to the polls on May 6th.

Firstly, though, a little lesson in how it works over here for our American readers:

1) In the UK, you elect a party, not a person. Nobody voted for Gordon Brown to become Prime Minister: his party chose him when Tony Blair stood down two years after the 2005 election. There are signs that this may change, with opposition leader David Cameron promising to alter the law if he comes to power, but for now it stands.

2) The election works on a 'First Past The Post' system: you select a Member of Parliament (MP) for your local constituency, and the party with the most MPs across the country is the winner. This means that a party with a low percentage of the overall vote can still win the election, which is a very real possibility this time around - and perhaps explains why electoral reform is such a hot political issue leading up the the vote.

3) To win outright, your party need an absolute majority - that is, more MPs than all the rest of the parties put together. If no-one gets an absolute majority, you get something called a Hung Parliament; a somewhat confused period in which the winning party decides whether to battle on alone without sufficient power to pass laws through government, whether to saddle up with one of the other parties in a coalition, or whether to head back to the polls to give the public another chance.

All the signs suggest that a Hung Parliament is what we are heading for this time. And this is why everyone is so excited all of a sudden: nobody has a fucking clue who's going to come out in top. Blue? Red? Brown? Green? Time to take a closer look at our frontrunners...

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I don't know very much about the day to day of British politics and barring some sort of cataclymic event that destroys the political pre-eminence of my country while simultaneously restoring it to the crown, I expect to remain this way. Most of my countrymen feel the same way. Normally, I would cite American ignorance in most things that take place outside of the ridiculously self contained bubble that we call home. But this time, It's really just because Britain is a political non-entity to any country with real political (read: economic) clout. So, until that changes, most of what I know about British politics will come from watching Question Time highlights and episodes of the The Thick of It.

My role during this next week of British political commentating will be as a passive observer who points out the peculiarities of the process from my yankee point of view. But where to start? No, wait - I take that back. Since the British electoral process lasts only one month there is no time to waste. Mind you, I'm not proposing that you change to the American system that is essentially a two year war of attrition against the electorate's better judgement. We spend so much time in elections cycles, that, come November 3rd, we have actually forgotten what life is like without being able to turn on the TV and see candidates viciously slandering each other as they smile into the camera. Still, one month?

The other bizarre part of this is the aforementioned "First Past the Post" system. To clarify, Labour can come in third in the election but come out as the ruling party? Regardless of your succinct definition, my dear Tim, this whole thing leaves me fucking baffled. However, we in the United States have the Electoral College which, if possible, makes even less sense and can produce the same outcome. So in the interest of maintaining our congenial relationship, I'll refrain from criticizing your arcane election system if you refrain from criticizing mine.